Biscuit lay on the floor her juices flowing from her like maple syrup on an early spring afternoon. She couldn't speak, she was just exhausted as he body begged for air. He walked out the door leaving her on the floor even stepping over her as he left dirt from his boots falling on her. She let out a whimper that he never seemed to hear. The door slammed shut as he called out one more time, "Please don't go."
Biscuit laid there for hours thinking about how she got to this point in her life, what made her make those choices and who could have helped her out. Thoughts raced in and out of her mind as she struggled to draw in a breath. "Help me" she stammered as she heard a noise at the door.
"How did you wind up down there?" A man asked as he entered the door. Biscuit couldn't see his face but recognized the voice as her best friend and neighbor Mike. "Help me" was all she could muster in a worn and scraggly voice her throat worn from the night's events.
"Biscuit you look like hell why do you let him even come over knowing what he is going to put you through? OK, let me help you up then." Helping her to the bed where she lied in her one room apartment in the worst neighborhood of suburban Grand Falls. She took a drink of whatever was lying on the nightstand and fell to her bed.
"He was nice at first, kissing me gently like he used to do. Then, he wanted me to swallow his manhood and when I refused to do it he forced it into my throat." She said her voice wetter and less gravelly thanks to the drink. "I just wanted him to love me like he used to do before the war." She cried sobbing into her hands.
"Honey, this isn't all his fault are you drinking that crap again?" Mike quipped in response. "Shut up Mike" she replied.
"Honey you didn't deserve it I know but, if you're going to let him back in after that last time did you think he was going to be any different?" He asked her sitting next to her, his right hand on her shoulder brushing back her long, sticky flowing hair wet from blood from her head. "Let me get something to clean up that wound for you."
He went into the bathroom and there lie the needle next to the sink, he picked it up and stormed right back into her. "What the hell is this, are you using that crap again too?" She began to cry covering her right arm from him as he began to look for needle marks on her feet, moving up her legs, her arms and hands. "I told you I would stop helping you if didn't quit using, didn't I?" He yelled at her finding the marks on her right elbow under her left hand. "Yes" was all she said as she began to cry harder.
Then her mind began to wander again to the day she met him, the day she found the only light in her life since the war. "You're the only one who still cares, who still comes around to check on me, please don't give up on me. I will try harder I promise" she cried harder.
"OK, but this is truly the last time do you understand?" he snapped at her.
"Yes" she replied as he left to rid her of the needle and the remainder of the drugs that the destruction brought with him to get her high before using her. "I was going to be a good soldier, defend my country and then I met him" she whispered to no one. "He ruined my dreams in one fail swoop of passion, I couldn't get him out of my mind as he ravaged every inch of my body in that warm desert sun."
"Yeah I know and look how he thanks you for all that passionate sex. He comes over and assaults your throat if you won't give him what he wants." Mike quipped getting aggravated that she won't let it go. "You need to move or get him to leave you alone."
"I know" she replied tearing up "Mike why don't you love me that way?"
"Because I am gay and you're not a man. We have been over that many times when your drunk don't you remember anything more?" He asked with a giggle.
"I remember talking to him, the passionate kisses the day we met our love entwined in lust for each other as our relationship began. He loved me so softly, so gentle and now I am just dirt under his feet, that place did this to him. What he saw there, he would never talk to me about after he finally came back to me. I wanted to stay but they discharged me when I got pregnant in the field, it was all over for my career they were mad at me, not him." She said a sad look on her face.
"I know honey but, Biscuit you need to let him go since you lost the baby and he came back into your life all you have done is get drunk or get high. Then he beats you, leaves you on the floor and you wind up alone and broken again. I cannot keep putting you back together."
"I called the VA again they refuse to help me till I get clean and I can't get clean if they won't help me. I begged him to finish me off today; he had that look in his eyes, the one where he looks lost and ready to kill. He just stared at me as the tear ran down from his eyes; he dropped me and left." Biscuit replied.
"Come here baby, let me give you a hug." Mike said with a tear in his eyes. "I still love you and I want you to stick around for a while." They laid on the bed for hours him wiping tears from her bruised face.
- As previously published on Helium.com
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